A matrix is messy. Its lessons are opaque. A scalar is clean and precise. The precision makes scalars seductive. But the usefulness and accuracy of a scalar depends on how many corners have to be cut to turn a complex set of information into a single number.
Decisions Are Hard
If the important things are hard to measure, and the measurable things misleading, what kind of decision framework is left.
Future You May Disagree
In her book Transformative Experience, LA Paul uses the choice to become a vampire as a metaphor for the big decisions... Surveys of vampires reveal a high degree of happiness. But will it be good for you- the actual you and not some average experienced by others. One of the weirdest parts of the decision, as Paul points out, is that once you become a vampire, what you like and what you dislike change. As a human, you might find narcissism repugnant. But vampires find narcissism refreshing and look back on their humbler non-vampire selves with disdain for their humility. Which "you" should you consider when deciding what's best for you: The current you or the you you will become?
Tease Out Your Secret Instincts
In a poem "A Psychological Tip," by Piet Hein, a mathematician who was trained as a physicist and who liked to play what he called "mental ping-pong" with a fellow dane, the great physicist Niels Bohr. Hein says that when you face a dilemma and can't decide what to do, flip a coin in the air... as a way to discover... "what you're hoping.”
You Are Happier Than You Think
Dan Gilbert, the Harvard psychologist... is the closest thing we have in the academic world to an expert happiness... Gilbert argues that each perspective is self-contained. When you're the pig, swimming in the pool... you aren't thinking about the meaning of your life or your identity, your philosophy side. You're happy, oblivious to whether your life has meaning... In that one hour of the day when your philosopher haunts you, you're uncomfortable with the nature of your life. But in those moments... you've lost touch with your inner pig and fail to correctly take into account the pleasure from the choices you've made in the other 23 hours.
People Are An Adventure
Instead of savoring your conversational brilliance, savor the experience of interacting with another human being. See what happens without expectation during that encounter and without a plan to steer it in particular directions. Give your conversational partner your fullest attention without thinking of what you're going to say next. Rather than have your friends and family as objects to serve your goals and increase your utility, see them as partners you commit to with no agenda as to what might emerge from interacting with them. View the chance to interact with them as more of an exploration and adventure than a scripted drama. Allow another human being the chance to open their heart. That can turn out to be a much more meaningful drama than the one where you're the main character, even if it means giving up control of the process.
Embrace Uncertainty
The future is shrouded from us. We crave control and certainty, so our natural impulse is try and illuminate the darkness... this is an illusion. You're better off trying to get used to the darkness.
Only Doing Reveals Truth
Rabbi Jonathan Sachs said, "The only way to understand marriage is to get married. The only way to understand whether a certain career path is right for you is to actually try it for an extended period. Those who hover on the edge of a commitment, reluctant to make a decision until all the facts are in, will eventually find that life has passed them by. The only way to understand a way of life is to take the risk of living it." All the facts are never in.
Success Is In the Revision
When science fiction author Orson Scott Card teaches creative writing, he has the students give each other feedback on their drafts. But instead of grading the students based on their final essays, he grades them on the quality of the feedback they give their classmates. His insight was that becoming a great writer requires becoming a great editor - learning to revise is essential to writing well. That's true of life, too. Don't worry about the rough draft. As long as you're able to kill your darlings and take advantage of optionality, you will thrive.
Often You Need To Do…Nothing
For some reason, we think of the tourist who has planned out the entire trip as rational... Sometimes it's better to sit and wait and watch and see what happens. Sometimes doing your utmost means merely waiting... It's waiting attentively. It's about paying attention... being ready for what comes next. Slowing down can help you see it, when it arrives.
